Nothing warms my heart more than watching children frolicking with their dogs, playing games, teaching tricks, sleeping side by side, or even sharing a secret bag of chips (unbeknownst to Mom and Dad.) These are scenes which I often enjoy while watching my 10- year old nephew and his dog. This relationship was not forged overnight. Instead, this bond was nurtured under careful adult supervision, with dog training and the involvement and education of my nephew. Without these key ingredients, the joys of the bond between kids and their canine companions--which can be so rewarding---can quickly turn into disaster.

I frequently get phone calls from exasperated parents with one of the following questions? "Do you train kids, too? It's the kids' dog and the dog is out of control! Our dog's total lack of respect for our children is driving us all crazy!" The sad fact with these complaints is that children cannot and should not be expected to care for the dog on their own. It's challenging enough for adults. Caring for a dog must be a family project and the major responsibility should not be put on the children.

My first suggestion is to make a list of all necessary chores such as feeding and watering, exercising, walking, playing, grooming, cleaning up, taking the dog to the vet, taking the dog to school, etc. Some of these chores are more fun than others but they should be shared equally by all family members. Of course, the older the child, the more responsibility she or he can be given. Assign different tasks to each member of the family (tasks can be rotated according to day or week). Do not expect a child to be as responsible as a parent. Between homework, after school activities, hobbies, sports and social events, unfortunately, the dog may be the last to be remembered.

Before you expect the dog to listen to the children, all adults must have full control and cooperation from the dog. Never ask the child to do anything with the dog if you are having a difficult time with the task. For example, if your dog is pulling you on a leash while walking down the street, a child should not yet be expected to walk the dog. Putting a training collar on the dog "to make it easier" for the child can only result in injury to the dog or desensitization to training collars. A child should never use a training collar on the dog; it's difficult enough for adults to learn it's proper use.

Training is the best way to teach your dog to respect your child. Adult supervision is of the utmost importance. Children and dogs should not be left lone. Also, a child should never, under any circumstance, be allowed to punish the dog. If the punishment is ignored, the dog quickly learns that the child cannot control him. Additionally, children tend to over-exaggerate what they have learned from an adult. Verbal reprimands can turn into yelling and screaming; a collar correction might result in a choking action. If, during the training process, the dog is not responding to the child, say nothing. Instead, silently yet firmly enforce the command. Once the dog obeys, the child should reward the dog with lots of praise, a treat or favorite toy. Along with command training, have your child teach the dog tricks and fun games, such as shake, fetch, find it, hide and seek. All of these games will stimulate the dog as well as make the child feel a sense of accomplishment. Children love to show off their success to friends and family. Use your imagination or get some fun training books and have your child teach the dog a different trick each week.

Keep in mind that punishing either child or dog (or both) will only result in problems and make matter worse. If the children are constantly being reprimanded for "winding the dog up," they will eventually tire of the dog and not want him around. Reprimanding the dog for "having fun" by chasing the children around the yard will only result in the dog associating the children with punishment. Whenever the children are around, the dog's fun stops and he is isolated from the pack. Punishment will only break down relationship between child and dog.

5 Do's and 5 Don'ts which I recommend to children:

• DO get involved with training by using lots of treats and toys.

• DO teach your dog fun games and tricks. Both of you will have fun!

• DO help feed and walk the dog- it will help build the bond.

• DO treat your best friend like you want to be treated yourself!

• DON'T grab, hit, push, pull, play rough or chase your dog-- you might hurt him.

• DON'T scream, yell or punish your dog. You will hurt his feelings.

• DON'T hug or kiss the dog's face, especially if he is sleeping.

• DON'T pet your dog if he is growling at you- growling means he is angry and might bite.

• DON'T take stolen objects or new bones from your dog- go and tell your mom and dad.

With lots of love and patience, both parents and children should share the responsibility of walking a dog and work together to make your best fiend a cherished part of the family.